Dating Blog

Top five songs about dating

Top five songs about dating

November 8th, 2017

*WARNING* this list is nearly exclusively show tunes and Broadway bangers. IT IS NOT MY FAULT. I AM AN OLD LADY, REALLY. I just occupy the body of a 22 year old. It is just my lot in life. *WARNING*   400 Lux by Lorde - a fine tune about teenage sweet mutterings. It’s not exactly clear if the situation described is about dating, however, ARTISTIC INTERPRETATION!!!!!!   &nbs...

Unorthodox ways to spend time dating

Unorthodox ways to spend time dating

October 25th, 2017

Have a picnic in a graveyard - This one is particularly weird for a first date option. It says that you’re ready to discuss the finite nature of living, however, it also declares you are a big fat weirdo. Dating may not be for you. Or it might! Who am I to judge. It’s just a word of warning, keep that in mind.     Go for a STI check up - It’s a bit forward. Howev...

Disney Princes I would go dating with

Disney Princes I would go dating with

October 3rd, 2017

Prince Eric (The Little Mermaid) - He is at the top of list for most. He might not, however, be the most gentleman like in a dating situation. He’s a bit blinded by the hunt for perfection. BUT HEY, HE HAS NICE EYES.         Hercules (Hercules) - okay, not technically a prince, but rather a demigod, but pendants are not welcome on this channel. OKAY? He...

Blind Date is back!

Blind Date is back!

August 12th, 2017

  Blind Date is back! It’s showing on Saturday nights on Channel Five. As the previous host, Ms Cilla Black, is now dead, they’ve got her rumoured pal Paul O’Grady to do the honours. The classic dating show has been revived for the masses.         To be honest, I’ve not watched it. I have no desire to watch it. I have vague memories from my childhood,...

Disney Princes I would not go dating with

Disney Princes I would not go dating with

August 6th, 2017

The Geezer from Snow White (Snow White) - First of all, this dickhead has no name. That would be the definition of aggro. Additionally, any bloke that goes about kissing dead girls is a freak. He needs to be locked up and not shown to small children. Also, on a kinda unrelated note, Snow White is a rubbish film. It’s scary and not funny and creepy. There are other iconic films to squander your...

Things You Don't Want Your Date To Do

Things You Don't Want Your Date To Do

August 4th, 2017

  Refuse to speak to you in a language you do not understand - Okay, okay, maybe this rule can be broken. However, mainly, stick to a dating dialect both parties are involved intimately with. It just not allowing for effective and efficient communication. Speaking is, really, so people can get messages across.         Eat an Onion and Garlic Sandw...

Lisa Rinna is the Queen of Dating

Lisa Rinna is the Queen of Dating

July 22nd, 2017

Lisa Rinna is a modern icon. She is the Mona Lisa. Her lips, her eyes and her crazy conduct. She is the queen of dating too. I mean, HAVE YOU SEEN HER HUSBAND? She’s been married to Harry Hamlin, an actor, who was once voted People Magazine’s Sexist Man Alive. This may not be true, but I think they said it on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.         A Mode...

Are Bella Thorne and Scott Disick dating?

Are Bella Thorne and Scott Disick dating?

July 18th, 2017

There is some dated dating news coming your way. Apparently, Bella Thorne and Scott Disick are some weird, perverted couple. They have been spotted canoodling in a very gross way. It is this way because she is a child, and he is a adult, with three children.     To those without small children, or whatever, Bella is a ex Disney Channel starlet. I’ve not got the foggiest idea...

5 dating ideas that rhyme with the word 'dating'

5 dating ideas that rhyme with the word 'dating'

July 12th, 2017

  1. Skating - this can be both on ice, or solid ground. It might be a general nuisance, and all over danger to the general public, but who cares? YOU’RE WINNING BY HAVING SOMEONE LOVE YOU. When your dating, you’re winning.     2. Orating - Go stand on the podium in Hyde Park, channelling your inner Prime Minister William Gladstone, and just let your wildest ideas co...

TV show Dinner Date is the biggest con!

TV show Dinner Date is the biggest con!

July 2nd, 2017

I know, I already touched upon this, but I needed to expand on the matter. The TV show Dinner Date is the biggest con of the 21st century. It’s the most heart breaking dating show on television.     Lured in for 43 mins For approximately 43 minutes, you are lured into thinking that one of three people is going to woo one person, who by the way is robbing two three course dinn...

Taylor Swift back in the dating game

Taylor Swift back in the dating game

June 24th, 2017

Appaz, the word on the grape vine, Taylor Swift is dating some bloke called Joe Alwyn. JA, as I’m going to refer to him from now, until I forget, is seemingly presenting himself as an actor. I’ve got no clue as if this is an accurate title. WHO AM I TO JUDGE? Oh just a member of the established press. He need to make an impression on me, before he does anything. I make people like him.   ...

An Amber Heard Update

An Amber Heard Update

June 21st, 2017

The other day, I had a discussion with this girl and her mum about Amber Heard. They were unsure of the validity of her domestic violence claims. I SHUT THOSE JOKERS DOWN! Johnny Depp fan girls and boys don’t come at me. YOU WILL GET CUT! I firmly, and politely, reminded her that she was not there and doesn’t know Amber nor Johnny. Plus, she donated all her settlement to a domestic abuse charity. ...

Emilia Clarke and Kit Harrington not dating

Emilia Clarke and Kit Harrington not dating

June 17th, 2017

Bloggers of the world, are we really a pathetic bunch of sad saps that we need to just churn out complete and utter dating news shite? Having just got done brushing through, barely really, an article about Emilia Clarke and Kit Harington not dating. All just a rumour concocted by some lazy, bored idiot in their bedroom.     Game of Thrones Emilia Clarke and Kit Harington star...

Who is Emma Stone dating?

Who is Emma Stone dating?

June 14th, 2017

Recently, and when I say recently, I mean about 20 minutes ago, before I ate my tea, I read an article about Emma Stone dating either her ex flame Andrew Garfield or Jake Gyllenhaal. This is prosperous.     Best of Friends Right, my in-depth research about Taylor Swift determines that Emma is best friends with her. TS also wrote my all time favourite Taylor Swift album, Red, ...

Kylie Jenner and Tyga call it quits

Kylie Jenner and Tyga call it quits

June 10th, 2017

Kim Kardashian West recently appeared on the excellent television programme Watch What Happens Live, where she dished some secrets. She told host Andy Cohen, while playing the legendary game Plead The Fifth, that she was relieved when Kylie and Tyga called it quits and stopped dating. She told the late night host their transition from dating to not was relatively calm. There was minimal drama. ...

Celebs Go Dating

Celebs Go Dating

June 7th, 2017

There’s a new, well new to me, dating show that I completely forgot to mention! The E4 show Celebs Go Dating is back for a second series. Perhaps, I am growing up, but E4 is just full of shite. All the shows I’ve seen on their recently is just dire. Rich Kids of Instagram is particularly bad.     How dumb is Joey Essex? The first go had Stephanie Pratt (yawn!), Charlotte Cros...